3 Ways to Get a Narcissist to Leave You Alone

I tried the Tourette’s thing and he laughed and said I was angry because I am jealous

There are 3 narcissist or more, in my life. They are all recruiting more & flying monkeys. My son-in-law & God knows who else. It has gone to breaking in & financial exploitation, smearing my name & it nearly ruined me. The latest phishing emails & one he wanted me to get arrested over someone illegally doing things with drugs. OMG!!

Has anyone found a way to make them think it was their idea to end the relationship?

I’m thinking the consequences of blocking the person might be greater if I initiate it, but if somehow they feel they decided to end it, it might be easier.

May I simply say what a relief to discover someone who genuinely understands
what they’re talking about online. You definitely realize how to
bring a problem to light and make it important. More and more people really need to read this and understand this side of your story.

I was surprised that you’re not more popular because you certainly have the
gift.

Sorry I just realised there are errors that I can’t edit. Eg. It should say walked with dogs ( definitely no hugs) and I wouldn’t make eye contact !!!

I thought j was doing great on No contact. Mine for 8 months. I am almost myself again. Today he was in my local park where I walk my dogs. Supposedly he now lives 20 miles away! Do I really wasn’t expecting it. Said he had a driving job that brought him there. Yeah right ! Tried to walk the other wAy when I saw him but he called one of the dogs over (one we got together!) of course the dog ran to him and wouldn’t come back to me so I couldn’t just ignore him. I did say as little as possible with intention of showing him I didn’t care but effectively we walked with hugs for 20 mins where I just talked about my new dog.

I amNow worried he will turn up again. Should I just tell him to not turn il like that , it’s not on and I don’t want To see him ?! Or ?

I had a long distance relationship with a narcissist, so I was never really in his company, but still I am angry with myself for putting up with the lies and verbal abuse that I took over the phone. I have never tolerated this in my younger years, and it is bothering me that I was putting up with it at this stage in my life. I have refused to be friends at all now and have cut off all contact. It is just that my own foolishness is preoccupying my mind, and I don’t really understand why.In the past, I have had relationships with one or two people with certain narcassistic qualities, but this is my first experience with a full blown, according to all of your videos that I have watched, total narcissist.

I need to get an extremely dangerous psychopath/ narcissist out of my home, and need an absolute miracle in order to do so. This person is evil, and capable of anything. He harms animals, and always speaks of killing. He says to me “Die bitch Die.” He has choked me out before, and I am very lucky to be alive. He said he used the full nelson chokehold on me. He claims he used to work in Security, among many other jobs. None of them lasted long. He attempts to run over pedestrians on that suspended license of his. He says people need to die. He feels no remorse whatsoever. What I do not understand is why he let go of me instead of finishing the job? He could have so easily killed me, and probably gotten away with it, the way the police are in this damned city. I desperately need help to get this monster out of my home.

Thank you. Your words make sense for my individual Situation. I feel better already. I will buy your book to say thank you in terms of money. Thank you

I just have to say, this article cracked me up! I’ve just come out of a very abusive relationship with a narcissist and I’ve been reading A LOT. I’d forgotten how to laugh, and this article was both useful AND made me laugh for the first time in a long time. Thank-you 🙂
(See, complete sentence!)

Thank you for this article. I stumbled upon it as I was looking for advice for my daughter. She is in a relationship with a Narcissist and is trying to break it off. However he keeps sucking her back in. They have only been dating six months and they are both in high school. This is her first boyfriend and we keep telling her this is not normal for any type of relationship. I know she is scared but your site has helped tremendously. She is trying “Show No Emotion”.

Kim I finally moved away. 1500 miles away. But I had not blocked. I went in hospital for a heart procedure. Three weeks passed and he called either drunk high or both. Said he was saying goodbye and it was good and I was the right one for him. I have not answered at all. Although until I started reading about narrsisists my heart thought I might. I’ve listened to you as well as autumn Blake. In the beginning I thought all these things. It’s amazing how this has opened my eyes. But after seven years with him the recovery I know will take some time. I am 20 yrs. Older. He is 40. I was a widow of 3 yrs. When I met him. I had money and good social standing. I’m a giver not a fighter. I was ripe pickings.

Ok so great – what do you do if you have kids with him? He is using the kids to get to me…

Thank you for No. 3 and your great sense of humor. I have been feeling so stressed out that I get dizzy and have shooting pain in my heart. I really need to laugh and relax.
Every day I have to remind myself of why I do not need to feel sorry for the narcissist EX and why I am never talking to him again.

Because I spent two month immersing myself with your articles and other education, I was able to do NO CONTACT perfectly by the time the hoovering started. Not only that, but I made sure my son also knew to go no contact, which he also did perfectly. No answering calls, texts or emails. Not even one! And one day, when he shows up at the door, I will not hear the door bell. Thank you for the advice on ghosting him in public as well. I am now prepared for that too! The joy I feel by shocking him out of his mind by not talking to him is so wonderful. I mean, he did say I talked too much, right? He never saw it coming with me. He really thought he had found his backup girl who would be there for the rest of his life. It’s easier to charm someone into loving you than it is to bully them into loving you after you have revealed your true (evil) nature.

He raped my soul. There is no coming back or “getting me back” after that. He figured out how to twist the knife, pour vinegar on the wound, etc. and then two months later… “Need a favor. What’s up? Any mail? You were right.” Uh huh. Can he be any more predictable??
thank you again.

My own nephew is the problem here…I cared for my parents for 32 years,my dad passed away a year ago….for the eleven years I cared for my dad I had to put up with my nephew’s daily and constant abuse…he came to visit my dad daily,his grandpa,and every day my dad and I received name calling,being robbed,our property destroyed… it’s weird with my nephew because my dad and I bought a car so I could have something to drive,we knew my nephew Brice would throw a major temper tantrum when he found out,which he did…he absolutely refused to admit anything was mine,my car,my dirt bike,total denial…any efforts to personalize my car were quickly met with destruction…I put a sticker on my back window that I bought on a trip to the beach,a rare treat for me…. I begged my dad to tell him to leave it alone,which my dad did,and my poor dad was met with a ” f%#$you! I’ll rip that thing off so fast!!!” And he did…he stripped the locks on the doors so I couldn’t even lock my own car….anyway,when my dad died he left me the house to sell so I could have the money to move and at 50 years old begin my own life….he terrorised me from day one,demanding entrance to my home,driving by constantly,basically stalking me…I was refused a restraining order because I could not prove his threats of violence……after I moved he quickly found out where I live,we live in a very small town outside of Bakersfield California,he destroyed me and my father’s house,tore it to pieces in an effort to keep anyone wanting to buy it….I knew he would destroy the house but the 2 acres of country property sold….I got a great job at an insurance company in Arvin,my hometown….a full year later he is still stalking me…the only words I hear from him are “bitch,slut,whore” whenever he drives by my office and sees me outside…if he isn’t across the street from my office he’s across the street from my home….he made friends with my neighbors across the street,how convenient for him to sit and watch me….I do not park my car at my home,he will destroy it first chance he gets….my neighbors down the street let me hide it in their back yard… anything I buy I have to keep it out of sight….I just wish he would get a life and leave me alone…I have tried a few times to get along with him,he likes not getting along…he even offered people money to beat me up and stab me so to disable me and prevent me from being successful with my ne w job and my life…no one would do it but no one wants to talk to the police either… I’ve learned to look for him while at work so I can be out of sight when he drives by therefore avoiding being called names….he also loves to break into my room,at my former home,and go the all my things,taking what he wants and destroying what he wished…where I live now he won’t dare step foot on my property…he wouldn’t do anything that will expose who he really is to my neighbors….I do now finally live a relatively peaceful life,but until I left that house I didn’t realize the damage all the years of name calling,invading my privacy and everything else had done….from Still Healing in California

I really get you on this. I’ve been thinking about it and no one covers this like you have. Sometimes the narc never gives up and I need to use quick, verbal surprises that I’m sure the narc cannot record. I’m glad. It’s empowering and I’m not lowering myself. The narc is the attacker and I’m only returning the projection. In case, it works out to my benefit, then the narc will be so manipulated that she’ll get a retraining order. I have been praying for it. Thank you.

Oh my goodness. I thought I was going crazy. I have a son with my ex. It has been so difficult. I feel like no one has taken me serious when it comes to dealing with him. Not the police, Child Protective Services, or from any other agencies. My ex’s father and grandfather where in law enforcement so the cops would just give him a slap on the hand and do nothing. I’m hoping to get full custody of my son and a restraining order.

All of these stories made me feel much better about myself.

I was in a relationship with someone who was extremely selfish. She even remarked that I obviously thought she was selfish and that her ex-husband and previous boyfriend (who she had cheated on me with) thought she was too. I was stunned she couldn’t understand the issue. I finally had to adopt the “no contact” rule. I had not talked to her or acknowledged her for over a year (a difficult task as she lived very close) when she suddenly texted me and asked if I would talk to her. She said she had done a lot of thinking. Silly me I agreed hoping to ride it out and move on again. The next text was one telling me she would see me at a particular hour of the day two weeks away. Did I say she had remarked how much she missed me? Since the place we were to meet was one I visited anyway I agreed. The first thing out of her mouth was that she missed me and hoped we could get together some time. I told her I knew we were both busy people and not sure it would happen. She then said, “Well, just call me and I’ll put you on my schedule.”. When I declined that honor she said, well she could meet me for lunch, . . in a month. I turned the tables on her and said I was going to a concert and I would be happy to pick up an extra ticket if she would go that particular day (I knew she wouldn’t commit). Her reply was “I’m sorry I can’t accept your invitation because “something might come up” and I’d have to cancel on you.”. I just looked at her for a few seconds then said, “Do I really have to say why I don’t call you any more?”. Then got up and walked out. Even then she’s tried emailing me with sexual suggestions to get me back in line. I printed them up and left them on her current boyfriend’s car. After a few hateful texts I passed her in the supermarket and she walked right on by without saying anything. Finally a successful conclusion.

Yessss to #3!! You actually end up having a good LAUGH! I even went as far as cussing him out and then asked him for money in the next sentence. I figured out that he uses his money to keep me close (pretending that he wants to take care of me like a “real” man”). So I used his own bait to my advantage! I even sold his car and cut off the cell phone which were in my name. He was still giving me money, thinking that I eventually would give him what he was USING ME FOR! After saving about $3K and finding out about another woman he was pursuing, my sister (God bless her) convinced me that what I was doing was no better than him. I was using his weaknesses to my advantage, knowing full well that this would never progress to anything other than me getting revenge. I was basically showing witch-like BPD characteristics and that is not the kind of energy I want to put out into the world.

I believe that I am in a reations ship with a narcissist. The first six months of out relationship was wonderful. “I’m finishing scho to be an attorney, I have “$20,000 in the bank to take care of myself right now, in two years you are going to be able to be a stay home mom like you want. Flowers, moonlit dates at his “special lake” that he had “never taken anyone else to. Fast forward to a year. Found out he was broke and borrowing money to survive, while telling me he was loaning money to family that needed it, that he had put $5000 on a diamond for a ring for me, that his car got broken into and all of his money and laptop stolen. “Could I help pay for things”-ie two destination weddings, phone bills, help with rent. While being a single mom and paying my own bills. He even went so far as to tell his landlord that his sister died and that’s why he was late on rent. When I was upset and we were fighting he goes to work and comes home and tells me that he was in a car accident with his boss and all he could think about was me because he thought he was going to die. (Or course this never happened either). He lost his job at one point and instead of telling me, he got up every day for a month and stayed gone all day while pretending to go to work.

Fast forward 2.5 years. He still lies about stupid stuff, he is obsessed with gettinga big house, his “truck,” having lots of money. He has a decent job, but I have no access to his bank account. Meanwhile his fingers are in my purse whenever he wants to spend my money. Every time we fight and I tell him it’s over–he manipulates it to make me look like the bad person.
He feels like he is too good for his current job and thinks he should be in a different position. He even told me about the job he got fired from the reason he got fired was because the job was beneath him and he was better than that. Although it wasn’t beneath him to let me work 60+ hours in a week at a bar just to be able to support him, myself and my son.
He has no connection to normal emotion. He even told the therapist that while we were at a funeral he knew he should cry, but just couldn’t.
The therapist which, by the way, he just quit going to without even canceling his last appointment. And then blamed her saying she never sent him an email telling him when to be there. Making appointments and not showing up is such a common thing for him. I expect it whenever he makes an appointment for anything other than things that make him feel good-like his bi-weekly salon hair cuts or a massage.
Backing up-when it comes to connecting on an emotional level, he just doesn’t. He will show emotion when it suits him to get what he needs but that is it. To understand any feeling I have is over his head. I am going through legal things with my ex husband, my 12 year old recently threatened suicide and one of my closest friends is addicted to drugs and I am watching her die and I am stressed about christmas because of paying for all the legal right now. When I dumped all of this out to him, he flat out said, “I can’t understand why you are stressed.” He was in no means joking.
He offered to take care of christmas, knowing what was on my list for my child, and when I brought it up he said oh, you still want to buy that? Sorry I can’t do that. Meanwhile he wants to buy a $700 tv on black friday and spends $100 on a tattoo consultation. Then tells me he is “broke again” because payroll screwed up and shorted his check $1000 and he “loaned his brother” $400.
The only thing he doesn’t do is rage out. That usually winds up being me when we fight because he pushes me to my breaking poing and I snap. So I don’t know what to think about that.
I told his best friend I want out. But I also told him i know he will smear me into the ground like he did his last ex. She lives in another state, so I don’t know how much he says about her is true, but I don’t believe any of it anymore. Supposedly she cheated numerous times, deserted her kids to go out partying while he took care of them and the home, and got pregnant by someone else and tried to pin it on him. Which, “shockingly” when I told him if she was that crazy, and if there was any slim chance it was his, he needed to get a paternity test/-she “miscarried” less than a week later.
I could go on and on, and I know i already have. As i re-read this I have to ask myself why in the hell i am still here. Then I remember its that guilt and manipulation they throw at you, making you feel like the awful, bad, needy person. I mean, how can I get mad when “he willingly pays the rent every month” or when “he went out shopping for myself but I bought shoes and a sweater for you instead, or when he says “it’s gonna be hard for you to find someone who will love you and your son like I do.”
Anyway, Im done. I’ve written a ton and there is still more! I think i just needed to vent this somewhere. Please excuse any typos or grammatical errors. I stink on my phone keyboard sometimes. And if you took the time to read this novel, thanks!

Thank you a thousand times for the Tourett’s idea! My narcissist is very prim and proper–and mean. She can smile sweetly and say the most hateful things imaginable, but if anyone around her utters a 4-letter word, she becomes indignant and starts moralizing. I had never thought of using that against her. Our next conversation is going to be fun.

Hi. I have done no contact since July 29, 2015. The times I had broken no contact before was to periodically remind the narc of his boundaries, that he needs to leave me alone, and that i have a real man in my life now. Well, this fool has called approimately 43 times and text messaged me 704 times, between July 29 to Nov 24, 2015. I have an app on my mobile that simply blocks all calls and redirects texts so i don’t see them each time. In reviewing, this fool calls all sorts time during the early morning…most likely when his new/old supply is in shower/sleeping or whatever. He has sent texts like, “look over the balcony” and such. I don’t. For all I know, this pathetic narc may be telling people I am doing something to him and my head pops out at the moment he wants it too; all to solidify his smear campaign. I am just steadily collecting them to show the courts when the time comes. Hopefully, this narc “madness” of his will stop!!! Very soon!!!

I finally realized I dated a control-freak narcissist for 8 years. During this time, he’s had various women on the side, friends and more than friends, that he contacted frequently. He stays in touch with all his exes as a way to keep track of what they’re doing and who they’re seeing. He would get angry if one of my exes called me out of the blue and encouraged me to change my number. He’d meet a new women, cause a fake fight with me to get me out of the picture so he can freely see the new women. Whe he realizes it’s not going to work, he comes back to me. Needless to say, we broke up over two years ago. After two months of our breakup, I felt I needed to call him and tell him how I felt. During this time, I knew he had already started seeing someone else and he told me it’s too late. I respected that and never tried to contact him again. Throughout the years, I’ve adopted the NC rule. He constantly texts me, I don’t answer. He calls me, I don’t answer. So he’ll call me from other numbers and when I hear his voice, I hang up. It’s been two plus years.

I have done the no contact. I’ve blocked his calls and he just finds another number to call from. I block that one and he finds another number to call from. It’s exhausting. They just don’t seem to understand the statement “leave me alone”.

I have an old childhood friend who became a born again christian pastor and is a major covert narc, and I NEVER return his calls, and yet he still calls..ugh..I tried to tell him to take me off his list of ‘souls to save’ but he’s a persistent little fucker..its just getting sad..i have a feeling he calls when his wife and kids are pressuring him to grow up and be a man so he reaches out for the old childhood narc supply ie me, and others. Once you understand how there identity is dependent on supply it makes sense how desperate they are, under the guise of ‘helping you’..as if you need it.

Do you have suggestions on how to handle this…he owes me money ($2200) and I have things of his that he wants back (I can sell for maybe $500). I know he’ll never pay me back. Do I give the stuff back to avoid his rage? My friends say keep it but I’m scared of ramifications. I hate looking out my windows, jumping at noises and double locking my doors. I’ve even accepted a job that requires a move to another town just to get away from him. Btw I’m still in awe of the realization of what I allowed myself to stay in. Thanks

Hi. I am currently trying to withdraw contact with my x narc. After 3 years I am only now coming to the realization of the form of abuse he put me thru’. Yes I’m an empath and it seems to be his perfect match. I stayed even after sometimes daily fits of rage because he told me he had 6 months left to live. Cancer! Yes, he’s a miracle and perhaps my prayers saved him(makes me a miracle worker) OR he’s a big fat liar! Pretty sure after all the grandeous lies that he makes himself sick at times just to remind me he’s dying. It’s been a week of no communication back to him (he calls and emails numerous times a day) and I feel nothing towards him other that that knee jerk fear when the unlisted number flashes on my phone. I’m still in awe of what I tolerated from him only because I thought he was dying. Thank you for the confirmation of cold turkey/no contact. I cave whenever we talk because he’s so smooth and has a way of making me believe that I’m the crazy one who’s so unreasonable. Here’s to saving one other from endearing the anguish and abuse of a narcissis she thinks is “the one”.

Hi, You were right, I found your site by typing ” How to get a Narc. to leave you alone”..I have an EX-Narc who refuses to leave me alone, but only contacts me once in a while . lately it has been a lot and I am sure some of it is due to me ignoring his emails. It wasn’t enough that 3 years ago I told him off. He loves to contact, apologize for his old actions and then proceed to ask me out. I find him repulsive, and everything in me wants to tell him off, but I know it will just feed him what he wants, even if it’s negative, so I have learned to immediately trash his emails, and go find something else to do. I no longer feel the need to respond to him. In truth, I wish there was a way to block incoming email on gmail so I would never have the “internet” as a door that is open. I also have no footprint on the internet to ensure he has no way to talk to me. Unless he hires a P.I., he will never know where I am, where I work, or anything personal about me ever again. I fear I may never truly get rid of him. Sad part is , he is married, has 3 kids, he cheats on her constantly with LOTS of other women ( 6 years ago I was one of them-dumb me). I think it is a lot like being haunted by an entity you cannot expel. Thanks for your sight. All of it was accurate and relatable.

As much as i chuckled at this.. it was sad cuz i can definitely identify with all of those scenarios. You’re left pondering if any real love even existed at any point. You go with the “i highly doubt it”.. option.. and then your heart breaks a little more and you stand firm as you try to stop all contact and move on.

Harder to do when you work in the same company as them .. and on top of that, you’re an empath.
*sigh*

One day, I will be there. 🙂

In 2010 I went no contact to a narc sibling. She continues to bully, threaten & curse letter, texts and calls. The only time I ever “broke” NC was in 2011 when I had an attorney write a cease and desist letter. I changed all my information and blocked her. She gets my new numbers and emails and continues. In 2014, on my attorney’s advice I responded with telling her to stop contact. It stopped for a few months and now is worse than ever. I have not spoken or seen her in 5 years, the only contact I’ve had with her in 5 years is to tell her to stop contacting me, yet she hasn’t. I’m ready to get a restraining order, which I’m sure I could get based on the physical threats she makes in her messages. Yes, the order may make her stop, but I’m also fearful it will enrage her more and she’ll become physically dangerous. Can anyone advise me on what I should do as Ignoring her and NC doesn’t seem to work. Please help me as her taunts and threats have left me mentally exhausted.

So I have been discarded again! after more times than I can count in the past 3 years. I am in week five of no contact which I’m sure is killing him. I have always been the one to call first trying to fix the relationship. What I can not understand for the life of me is why he keeps showing up at the gym during the time he knows I’m in my yoga class?! He never says anything he is just right where I can always see him. I don’t talk to him but I have looked his way. One time he screamed my name out when he noticed I was ignoring him. If he doesn’t want to be with me and has a knew supply. Why won’t he just leave me alone? I don’t get this I’m very to all this

I took my two kids and fled a psychopath six months ago he came to visit a week ago and turned the happy home i created upside down. hes now staying in a hostel 1/2 mile away out boozing and enjoying his “holiday”. he had a meltdown screaming and shouting because i wanted to spend some time with a friend, he screamed at my 4 year old he was leaving and slammed the door turned up an hour later i had my dad tell him to leave. I have just established no contact as i cannot deal with it anymore i only want contact through our lawyers after years of being tormented i have to protect the kids. Heres the kicker im irish living in ireland hes american lives there his ticket to leave isnt until next monday he decided to stick around and torture us a few more days

My narcissist has been absent for a month now which is the longest he has been distant. I called him out on his lack of empathy and rages and wonder if that is what gave him the will to let go. He was so obsessed with our relationship and made it feel like a fairy tale. This is so painful!

wow! i am just so happy to have found your blog! #3 is hilarious and i think i will use it if need be but i am doing full no contact at the moment. its great because he is an infernal bore! lol

[…] 3 Ways to Get a Narcissist to Leave You Alone […]

I love #3. Living in a big city, there are plenty of people you want to just stay out of your space. I’ve learned to act like a crazy nutter just to get rid of them. Lol!

Good article, but it’s hard when it’s a family member (like your parent) and when you yourself are over empathic (an empath). Currently, I’m the only one, out of five siblings, that is still talking to this person. I’ve come up with a few techniques to cope, but it’s so draining.

It has been three weeks since I left the narcissist… I have never felt better, the weird thing is I do not miss him but I read everything I can about narcissism it is almost compulsive… I wanted to talk about one experience I had when my son and I spent a week end at my narcissist ex home. I came back to the house and saw that my 9 year old was playing with a huge knife ( looked more like a machete, I am not exaggerating!). Seeing my son without supervision playing with this knife gave me a true deep unsettling feeling… I told my ex not to give a huge knife to my son to play with. My son spoke about this event today and ask me why did my ex gave him a knife to play with, ( it is not his dad by the way)my son never asked him to play with.a knife…My ex told my son’ do not tell your mom about it she would be very mad’ ,… I find that sickening and I believe my ex knew exactly what he was doing… It gave me chills. But I am wondering if I am overreacting as I often doubt myself being recently on my own… Why did he do that? I keep on trying to find answers and understand his behavior.

This is awesome – wish I could do this – and this is on the tee of what goes on. Bc I’m living it right now – he will call every now and again and says he loves me stop by are something try get me n my youngest son come home – the wort part is he for away with ever being diagnosed – but he matches everything that I have read everything and he believes it but as soon as it got close he was at multiple personality disorder then bipolar – bam long story short – he got rid of us stopped going to psycatrist or councleor now just as if he wants is to forgt all that happen including beating me up severls times and getting off with anger magamnent classes only and move on with life ! It’s crazy I do feel like I can’t stop talkimg to him and yes the life had been sucked out of me

lmao love the tourettes idea! i kinda did this the last time he turned up uninvited. I ignored the first knock completely, at the second i turned round to look at the door to see him leering in through the little window and i shouted “what the @**@ do you want?
It was a small thing but i think it totally back footed him. he later emailed saying he was sorry hed responded to my aggression with his own but what did i expect him to do when i refused to answer his emails/txts etc. Its made me laugh to this day and im still glad i did it, i think it was totally the right thing to do 🙂

This did bring me some joy, as for any article that I am now furiously researching, any and all informtion is helpful to me!!!!!!! Thank you so much for bringing this challenge to me. Serious but light… Refreshing!

I really enjoy reading your articles! Its given me so much insight.
My husband one time asked me why I liked one of your articles on FB and was so angry with the contexts of the article..he said he emailed you to state his concerns. I think he said something in the lines of you were brainwashing me!
Keep up the great work! Xoxo!

The potential problem with #3, is that the Narcissist may be recording anything you say. If you include your response with obscenities, the Narcissist will replay your words to others, reinforcing his/her contention that YOU were the evil one, not them. The best way to deal with the Narcissist is NO CONTACT, EVER AGAIN…

Reblogged this on Positive Healing.

LOL on the third! N Ex actually HAS tourettes, though its mild (only head jerks now). If I were to do that, he would DEFINITELY try to take our girls away, and they would NOT be safe.

My goodness #3 had me dying laughing!! LOL!

Oh my god, I laughed at #3, but it’s true…I only did that once though and it was before we went no contact. Unfortunately I have to leave a line of communication open with ex because of the kids…it’s email and online, thank goodness. But I swear, if I say/ask for one thing, he will go to whatever length to do the opposite! So it is literally a game…an exhausting stupid one, but to “get what I want” (or what the kids want) I have to pretend or ask for the OPPOSITE, or show that I don’t care about something that I need or want for the kids. The only other option is to fall back onto our court order (which is unfortunately VERY vague) whenever I can, and repeat the message when he breaks orders around communication or child battles (and honestly, I have to pick and choose these too, because it’s just tiring to do it for every one…eventually he tires of it. If I didn’t have to be a good model for the kids, and felt like it wasn’t right to not be “above it all”, I seriously would play his game too. He’s not as smart as me, but I can’t let him know that because it makes it worse for the kids when I do. Laying low and pretending is hard…maybe that’s why I’m so mad some days!!! Arggg…great posts

Number 3 made me LOL as that would be my response at this point. I think I would almost wisper the regular parts of the sentences, to add that extra punch to the cuss words. LOL 🙂

You had me laughing Kim, sadly I can relate to most all of the above. The text ‘how r u?” I would wait a few hours to reply, telling him how I was. 3 weeks later still no reply then when you’ve finally given up ever getting one another “Hey”. The “happened to just be driving by” 60 miles away from where he lives (because I left the town). Then the bs of he missed me which in the end boiled down to “Do you have $20 I can get, I’m really broke.”
The 2nd last time he pulled the dropping by thing, I laid down on the couch and went to sleep, I woke up as he slammed the door.