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Choosing to Unlock the Life You Love

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by Lolisha GLT Chaney

Defining moments will come, when life itself challenges us: Fight for what you want or get much, much, less.

You are not just going to automatically end up with the best in life. It will not happily fall on you, like a summer’s rain dancing down from the clouds.

All people are not concerned that you get it and to the contrary, some will offer the bare minimum by default.

The best is for choosers!

Choosing happiness is reserved for people who are brave enough to believe that better is available and go after it. You cannot be satisfied staying in ragged conditions, even if that is where you find yourself at the moment. A true desire for quality will urge you past it. If you are at your worst, becoming your best must be a standard beating through your heart delivering oxygen to the choices that will lift you out of a lesser condition.

It takes courage to be successful because you will have to make opposing decisions from the plans others may have for you. You must not be afraid to say your soul is your own. To have a quality life, you will have to decide what you want. I believe that because of this, life gives us little ‘gifts’ of dissatisfaction to highlight what is important to us.

By experiencing what we don’t want in life, we begin to understand what we want. However, those gifts can turn into curses, when we cower away from taking steps to get what we want.

Break Free Bootcamp
When we have the unacceptable experience (sent to teach us to want more) and then accept less, we suffer. When we are betrayed in a relationship, it is not meant for us to accept disloyalty as a way of life. It is to show us that loyalty is important in a relationship and off we go in pursuit of that ideal. When we are mistreated by others, it’s to show us that we should be treated better. Otherwise, you would not perceive it as betrayal or mistreatment.

But when you do, and then say it’s okay you are now violating your own integral standard and must pay the penalty. But even the penalty is a gift to awaken you out of your misery and force you to make a decision towards internal peace. Life loves you so much that it will keep nudging at your conscience in order for you to go after the best.

Sometimes we may confuse fear with comfort. For some, the comfort zone is not comfortable at all. It is a prison cell, but it’s familiar. Although we watch our hopes and dreams float away like passing clouds as we look through our prison bars, we accept the prison. Why? Because to leave requires a fight that we are unwilling to face. We are not happy where we are, but we are too afraid to disrupt the routine.

Please think about this routine, this regularly followed, fixed program. This means your misery and dissatisfaction, if regularly followed, are a fixed program. Don’t like how you’re living? Well, if you do nothing to change it, not only will it continue, it will intensify.

If you allow yourself to live an embittered life, and concede with dissatisfaction, the world around you will gladly oblige. If you don’t require a red carpet, it will not be rolled out for you. If you do not require respect, you will be disrespected by default. When you pursue the good in life that harmonizes with who you are and refuse to accept the derelict, life will also gladly oblige.

For whatever you permit, is permitted in life. Just as your life will not accept whatever you declare unacceptable.

Break Free Bootcamp
Choosing happiness begins with an honest assessment of your world. Often times, we stand so deeply in someone else’s standard of living: how they believe we should be talked to, treated, and paid; where we should live, who we should live with, and how we should be living.

It will take quiet moments of reflection to sort through aspects of your life and examine how they affect you (it’s even helpful to make a list so you can see the cold, hard, facts in tangible form). Then a decision to change it must be made in order to lift yourself from that place. 

There will be a price to pay for the glory days in your heart. You will not be able to remain in the dismal and see that glory. It must be purchased, it must be pursued. Something will have to be sacrificed for the new experience to enter your life.

This is why most importantly, you must have the courage to make this sacrifice and trust that you have made a worthy attempt to construct your ideal, your most suitable conditions. This job is ours and ours alone. No one will do it for us, nor can they.

Our hearts beat to a distinct rhythm and our prisons are unlocked by the keys of our own heart.

How To Start Choosing Happiness

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About the Author

Lolisha Chaney is a freelance writer and inspirational speaker from the San Francisco Bay Area, CA.  As a depression survivor, she draws upon the wealth of knowledge gained from her journey to emotional wholeness.  Lolisha has accepted the call to a higher lifestyle with a focus on helping others by telling her story with refreshing candor that resonates with the human experience.  This work is used to inspire others to remodel their lives from the inside-out; getting life together, one thought at a time.


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