Become a Recovery Coach

Why and How I Left Teaching to Become a Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Coach

Sharing is caring

If you asked me ten years ago which career I wanted to be in for the rest of my life, I would have replied, “A school teacher”.

In fact, that’s exactly what I was doing ten years ago. 

After working in the banking industry for years, I began to feel a niggling emptiness.  While I made pretty good money and enjoyed decent benefits, the fact of the matter was that I wasn’t doing anything noble.  I wasn’t leaving behind a legacy that I would be proud of when I got older.

One day I realized banking was no longer for me when I found myself eight months pregnant, rolling a box of banking sign-up forms on a dolly to a local business as part of my job.  I was selling my soul to a corporation that cared nothing about me as an individual, and there I was pimping out their products to people who didn’t really need them.

That’s when I decided to go back to college to become a teacher.

It was hard at first.  I stayed full-time at my banking job, enrolled in college full-time, and raised my two older sons and their new baby brother.  On top of that, I had just left my abusive marriage.

Looking back now, accomplishing all of that had to be divine guidance.  In fact, I’m sure it was.

How it all began

Those of you who’ve been following me a while or have worked with me may know I started my student teaching in Egypt.  I was still with my narcissistic ex then and I left everything behind to be his second wife and complete my internship in his country. 

I was highly codependent and thought I was doing the right thing for the sake of the son we shared.  Can you imagine?  I agreed to be a second wife!

At any rate, it was during my stint of student teaching at AIS Egypt that the first political uprisings began and all US citizens were evacuated.  (In true narcissistic style, my Ex said the uprisings started because I’d wanted to come back to the US so badly.  As though my sheer will alone had incited the riots and subsequent evacuations!) 

I finished my student teaching requirements in the US. 

About six months after my return, I got my own apartment, moved out of the place I shared with the narcissist, and served divorce papers on him.  His response was to quit his job and move back to his country, thereby abandoning his only son who was merely 20 months old at the time. 

I taught at a local public school system for three years.  In order to make ends meet, I taught during the day and tutored after school.  Although I was constantly exhausted, my newfound freedom made it all worth it.

Fast forward three years.  I loved my students.  I loved teaching.  But because of SOLs and the shady practices of school administration, I knew I couldn’t stay in that career.  I began considering alternatives.

The Dawn of

Back at home, I’d started a blog as a way to express my creativity.  However, I’d not yet begun writing about narcissism because, after visiting several therapists, I was told I’d only needed to create better boundaries and my marriage would have worked out better. No one could seem to help me with my debilitating acute stress symptoms and intrusive thoughts, so I took matters into my own hands.  I began working on healing my self-esteem, my inner child, and rewriting the narrative scripts that kept running through my mind.

In the meantime, I wrote blog articles for people aspiring to be entrepreneurs.  And to my delight, I started to gain followers.

However, I felt a strong pull to tell my story of abuse.  After about six months of writing about entrepreneurship, I completely transformed my blog.  I still didn’t recognize I would be writing on the topic of narcissism, but a seed had been planted and at that point, I simply wrote what came to me.  I definitely had a muse back then…a muse who would guide me over the course of months and who would help me turn my blog into what it is today.

This is around the same time I learned of the Law of Attraction and how our negative programming must be shed in order to truly live.  

I was onto something.  I researched narcissism after learning about it during a Google search.  I discovered I’d been the target of narcissistic abuse.  Like everyone else who stumbles across the topic, I wanted to know everything about it.  I wrote more articles and gained more followers.  I recounted my personal experiences and readers could relate. 

For the first year and a half, I wrote article after article, did more and more research, and began to contemplate how I could help others out of their own toxic relationships.  I became certified in life coaching, the Law of Attraction, and considered going back to school to become a licensed therapist.

I offered pro bono coaching for about six months.  What I learned was that the typical life coaching progression didn’t really apply to narcissistic abuse victims. 

I also learned that traditional therapy wasn’t helping most people, either.  I knew I had to figure out a way to help people out of the darkness of abuse, but I had to make some tough decisions.  I quit my after-school tutoring job, started working as a part-time substitute teacher, and began to truly focus on what heals people who have been narcissistically abused.

It was tough financially.  I sold everything I had of value.  Heck, I even sold my plasma.  I did odd jobs such as running gigs on Craigslist.  I created resumes and tutored people in English.  Yet, in spite of all that, I often didn’t have enough money for a simple cup of coffee.

Some days, I just wanted to give up and go back to the 9 to 5.  I missed having a steady paycheck and being able to leave work at work.  I missed having benefits.  But, I knew I had a purpose to fulfill.  I also knew that living a life of mediocrity wouldn’t make me happy.  So, I kept going. 

Today, is one of the top sites in the area of narcissistic abuse and recovery. 

What this all means for you

I truly believe that devastating situations can be catalysts for transformation if we let them.  We don’t have to live lives of conformity or stay in abusive relationships.  We don’t have to be victims of generational dysfunction or do things the way our parents and grandparents did them.  We don’t have to hang onto dead dreams because we’ve been told we should.

All of us – including you – have the power of choice.

That doesn’t mean it will always be easy.  I’ve had my moments of menacing madness along the way.  I’ve been scared, confused, and unsure of myself.

But, what I didn’t do was give up.  I kept putting one foot in front of the other because I knew as long as I did that, my destiny would unfold in the way it was supposed to.  I trusted in God and The Universe to take care of me.

And they have.

Many people just like you who have been victims of narcissistic abuse often aspire to help others because we, as a demographic, are healers and light-workers.  It’s the Empath in us.

While not everyone will go on to become therapists, coaches, or healers, many of you will.  We are in the middle of a global shift designed to enlighten, educate, and heal. 

If you’d like to help others find their way out of the darkness of narcissistic abuse, but don’t know how to get started, I can help.  Indicate your interest by filling in the form below and I’ll be in touch soon.

I want to start a recovery blog!

I am interested in starting my own recovery blog so I can help others overcome narcissistic abuse - and live healed and empowered lives!

Powered by ConvertKit

To your future,


Sharing is caring

Leave a Comment:

Katherine says March 15, 2024

What you wrote really resonated with me in many ways. The biggest difference is that my father was a raging covert narcissist and probably had bipolar disorder, while my mother was possibly a covert narcissist herself. There was a lot of other abuse in about every abuse category, as well. I discovered this whole narcissism world 2 years ago and it has literally made my WHOLE life make sense, especially in the understanding that I was the scapegoat, confirmed by a family member. I had no idea. Any way, I would very much like to find a way to help others raised by narcissists. It affected every part of my life, both as a child and adult. I’ve done a lot of work on myself for most of my life because because of the fallout from my childhood and being misdiagnosed, as major depressant, while in bipolar 2. I’ve come a looong way with a lot a resilience and work. I’d like to look into all of this. Thank you for your transparency and encouragement!
Best, Kathy

Marissa says February 14, 2022

I endured narcissistic abuse for 5 years during my marriage, causing me constant physical pain in my upper extremities. I then took 2 years to get mentally healthy and more recently left a 2 year on/off again relationship with a more covert narcissist. I want to help others while continuing to build my confidence in being authentic to myself. I think what is hardest for me is being abused and the gaslighted into believing I’m the narcissist. Sometimes I don’t know the truth. That’s why I’d love more info on this. I have a strong pull from God to help others but I also feel like I need more healing as well. Thanks so much

Savitri Guard says August 20, 2021

Hello Kim,

Amazing life story. Thank you for sharing. I appreciate all you do! This is such a vital area… bringing awareness of NPD and abuse too our society. It is key. There isn’t much help as of yet… and it seems like that is how NPD is able to exist. …As if it hides in the shadows and it’s up to us to shine a spot light on it.

I am passionate about helping others in a group setting. I haven’t found any local recovery groups in Austin and it blows my mind! How is this possible? I knew I had to do something about this. I don’t know where to start however. I’ve contacted my church but they said they do not need this at the moment. Frustrating.

Well, it would be great to chat.

Stay Blessed,

Kerryanne Holness says January 29, 2021

Hello Kim,

I loved reading every word of the story you provided on your page. I could resonate to so many things you had mentioned.

I have been going through my own healing journey for over a year now. Life is so wonderful and free after recognizing and surviving narsassistic Abuse. I’ve experienced a few narsassistic relationships in my life. For a very long time I have been feeling the pull to help others survive broken relationships. I recently realized I want to become a coach who can help victims of Narcissistic Abuse.

What program do you offer for certification of becoming a Narcissistic Abuse recovery coach?

Narsassisim is one of the most misunderstood personality traits and its incredible that as you’re going through the abuse, how alone one could feel when you don’t have the ability to articulate exactly what you’re going through.
I feel called to really assist other victims to recover from this horrible experience.

I really look forward to hearing back from you.

Enjoy your day,


Lisa Servis says November 20, 2020

30 year survivor of NA. Separated 5 years ago. Have been working on my own educational journey and healing ever since. Divorce to be final in January 2021 and I’d like to help others that are on this path. College Degreed and looking for resources on how to train to be a coach/mentor/therapist, especially interested in the physical aspects of trauma bonds.

Any help greatly appreciated.


Deanna says August 30, 2020

“If you’d like to help others find their way out of the darkness of narcissistic abuse, but don’t know how to get started, I can help” Hi, I am looking for info on this….Thank you

Angie Holt says July 24, 2020

Hello, Kim. You have helped me so much. I retired from teaching and vowed to help others who have suffered. Trauma bonding is an invisible hold on young people. This information should be taught in schools. You are extremely knowledgeable of narcissism … nothing like living and learning the hard way, huh? I am a survivor and want to help high school students in my area learn the red flags. People with good hearts do not realize such evil exists in this world, especially when you love someone who is so good to you before marriage. After marriage we’re confused and try harder to go back to the good times. Finally, we realize the goods times were FAKE! My question is how do I get the credentials to become a coach for victims?

Thank you,

Angie Holt

Caroline says July 8, 2020

Hello am interested to talk to you my husband is a narcissist i need help am so depressed please emai me what steps i should take thank s

Mary hamilton says July 8, 2020

Hi, Kim I am interested in becoming a coach / healer and helping people know there is life after Narcissistic abuse . I was married for 20 years to a abusive ,entitled disordered person . I feel a calling to help in my soul .

Heather says September 18, 2019

Hi Kim. Thank you for what you do. I’m 33 and have a 1 year son with a narcissist. I am not in a relationship with this man. I have gone through severe narcissistic abuse and have spent the last year taking care of my son and working on my healing. I’ve come far. I’ve come far, have experienced a huge shift of consciousness, and awakening to my divine guidance. This man is still involved with my son. He married another woman when my son was 3 months old. I have experienced abuse from his cult-like narcissistic family as well. Abd now his wife who seems to be narcissistic as well. I’ve struggled to completely disengage up to now. There really is much to say. But what brought me here was actually my search on how to become a coach to help people in their healing and awakening after narcissistic abuse. I feel strongly called to this, though right now i barely have money and am trying first to go back to finish my degree in English. I feel called to write about my experience. Eventually I want to write a book. I was traumatized during my pregnancy and received psychic dreams and started to have communication from who I believe to be my divine guides. To regular people a lot I have to say sounds crazy, but as you know, it’s real. I know the abuse awakens many people. I do believe I am a lightworker called on a mission to help raise our consciousness and help heal. Right now I’m stuck. I have a beautiful little boy. I want to keep him safe and aware how I can. Co-parenting with a narc is terrifying. I’m becoming less afraid. I feel strong. I just don’t know how exactly to get back on my feet financially. This is long, I really just want to connect with others who coach or help people heal from this specific kind of trauma. Thank you for everything you do!


    Rachel Erschen says November 29, 2019

    Hello! My story is very similar to yours. I have a 2 month old son and I’m dealing with a narc as well.

SB says November 27, 2018

My heart feels heavy knowing that the burden of narc abuse is out there. I was a victim to it for 5 years and in the worst conditions. I lost everything and myself. I am slowly rebuilding but my heart is unsettled knowing that everything happens for a reason, I was placed in that situation to bring light to others that have gone through it.
I just am not sure how to start or in what avenue. It would be great help to get your insight.
I am looking to create a better future for all the victims that struggle and can’t find the power within themselves to get out.

Robert Riksheim says August 16, 2018

I’d like to get in touch with you. After living in Africa for a year, my life changed extremely. A few weeks ago I realised what was wrong with me. I’ve been been abused! I’m not able to accept what happened to me, so that Is why I keep moving from country to country. But I never seem to get away from the loneliness

    Caroline says July 8, 2020

    Thanks for sharing your story am in unhealthy relationship my husband us a narcissist please help me.I need help

Jessica Williams says April 20, 2018

Looking to become advocate for narcissistic abuse survivors. I am one myself, but don’t know where to start or what degree I need to look into to be able to do so. Would appreciate any help.

Thank you

    Kim Saeed says April 20, 2018

    Hi Jessica,

    It helps to have some experience with psychology and neuroscience, but not absolutely necessary. I have a degree in teaching with a minor in psychology and I also completed a few different ‘Life Coach’ certifications, but most of them don’t focus on traumatized clients. So, I kept the ethics materials and had to modify the rest. You must have some training in trauma recovery because survivors have unique struggles and mindsets that come from being traumatized. So understanding those struggles and how they relate to their everyday life is essential. There are many different ways to do this.

    Hope that helps!


Jeffrey Dodson says February 27, 2018

You are a beautiful soul and I appreciate you very much and I am grateful for your work and strength. I want a consultation to discuss training and or ideas to building a healing network. I have recovered and I’m doing good self care and have boundaries established and ready to help others. Namaste.

    Kim Saeed says April 16, 2018

    Hi Jeffrey,

    I am very happy to know you have recovered and taking care of yourself. Wishing you all the best as you shift into higher levels of healing.


Anonymous says July 25, 2017

You saved me… I’ve told literally a hundred people about your site… God Bless you

    Kim Saeed says July 26, 2017

    Thank you, Anon. That’s very kind of you…glad to know I’ve helped in some way 🙂

    Kim XoXo

Irene says October 12, 2016

Thank you for sharing your history, Kim 🙂
I would have been reblogging your post, if it was possible, because I have some followers, as I know, could find their way out of abuse and to stay as a victim instead of living their life in a better way.
I have followed you for very long time and I know, how great advice you are giving people in need.

    Kim Saeed says October 12, 2016

    Thank you, Irene 🙂 Yes, I’ve seen you around since the beginning and I truly appreciate that you have followed me through my blogging journey. I hope things are going well with you and that you’ve been able to sell lots of jewelry 🙂 Wishing you all the very best!

    Hugs and Love,


Victor E says October 10, 2016

Hi Kim,

Thank you for sharing your amazing story! Your courage to pursue God’s calling in your life inspires me to heal, to grow, to pursue my dreams.

Thank you.


Victor E

Jennifer says October 10, 2016

Thank God you stuck to it! You are truly a miracle to me and so many people. And you’re a pioneer in an area that desperately needs to be better understood by therapists and counselors who are giving people horrible guidance. I thank God every day I stumbled on this and other sites that helped me out of the hell I was in.

    Kim Saeed says October 12, 2016

    Jennifer, thank you for your kind praise. I am happy to know I’ve helped you in your own journey and I wish you all the very best in your recovery. It’s great to have you as part of the Let Me Reach tribe 🙂


Katy says October 10, 2016

What does your abbreviation SOL mean? It’s not an abbreviation that I recognize. Thanks!

    Kim Saeed says October 10, 2016

    Hi Katy! It stands for Standards of Learning 🙂

      Kimberly lewandowski says October 26, 2016

      from Kimberly Wow can a word bring meaning ,change enlightenment to a soul. narrassist. when i realized my husband of 30 yrs. was one . i was so horrified and excited at the fact it made all the sh/t i have been through now made sence. Oh man what i thought was love was’nt at all]++[[-.I cant wait until it really happens .I know that is awayes off but true love respect with some one could really be amazing . I”m scared about some things, but am trying to be strong. Hanging in there for now.

Add Your Reply